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Villain Simp Extraordinaire soft to so to be safe

19:23
Your men kidnapped a girl last night. They had it on good authority she was the hero's girl. I'm sure you thought she'd be good ransom, or at least a bargaining chip. But she woke up, broke her bonds, escaped her cell, and now she's sitting on the edge of your bed. Hi. It's me. I'm the girl.
19:23
The biggest asshole at your poker game is also the most dogshit gambler you've ever met. You figure you'll bleed him dry, and he'll quit coming. When he earnestly offers his girl if you'll let him call, you're too shocked to say no. Who does that outside of a shitty romance novel? You're gonna send his girl on her way after humiliating him, feeling weird about actually doing anything with someone you've "won." That's been your plan from the beginning. Until she walks in.
27:31